


Intruder

by Itsquiettime



Category: Septiplier - Fandom, jacksepticeye, markiplier - Fandom, youtube - Fandom
Genre: I don't even know what to tag this tbh, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-21
Updated: 2016-07-21
Packaged: 2018-07-25 21:37:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7548091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itsquiettime/pseuds/Itsquiettime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mark and Jack had a habit of staying up unreasonably late and playing video games</p>
            </blockquote>





	Intruder

Mark and Jack had a habit of staying up unreasonably late and playing video games.  They would either play something together or trade off every so often so one could watch the other. 

It was 3 o’clock in the morning and Jack was playing Dark Souls 3 obsessively while Mark lay with his head cushioned on Jack’s thigh.  

HI had been playing for the past hour and a half and it had been time to switch for a while, but Mark was content in the moment.  He was happy with simply watching as Jack laughed and played a game that he loved. 

While Jack adored the game to bits, Mark wasn’t such a diehard fan.  He liked it, sure, he just wasn’t a fanatic like his boyfriend.  So he propped himself up and got comfortable as he watched Jack battle dragons and skeletons and horrifying… things… to get to the big bad bosses. 

He sat up to grab a bottle of water from the kitchen when movement from the countertops caught his eye. 

Their house was pretty much just one huge open area with hallways and doors that broke off into the bedrooms and bathrooms.  There weren’t that many places that Mark couldn’t see from simply lying on the couch, so he must have been really into watching the game Jack was playing to not notice anything in the kitchen. 

As he leaned forward to get a closer look in the darkness, he realized that it was some sort of animal that could almost be mistaken for a giant rat if rats were the size of his head. 

An Opossum.  There was.  A fucking Opossum. Sitting on their counter… and watching them play games. 

Grossed out and panicked, he grabbed Jack’s arm and stage whispered, “Jack?  Jack!  Can you see that?” 

Miffed that he had to stop his game, Jack looked over and whispered, “See what? Mark it’s really dark in here.  What are you talking about?” 

Mark jumped to his feet and flipped a nearby light switch.  As light flooded into the room, they watched as the thing leapt from the counter, plopped onto the floor, and scurried away. 

Jack, shooting to his feet, said “Oh my God, Mark there is a _wild animal in our house_.” 

Mark sprinted into the kitchen to look for it, only to find it completely gone.  “We need to find it, Jack.  Oh my God, Jack it could nibble on us in our sleep how did it get in here how long was it living with us I’m going to die.”

The two of them scrambled around, flailing and yelling at one another to find it _find it **find it.**_

They finally found the thing two hours later, after their entire house had been trashed looking for it. Couches had been turned over, clothes lay everywhere, the oven had been pulled out along with the fridge, and absolutely everything was everywhere.  

They found it as they were pulling out the dryer to see if it had gotten behind it.  

Mark was never ever one to hurt an animal.  He just couldn’t bring himself to.  Most of the time. 

At the point they had found it, he had been looking for two hours, it was 5 in the morning, they had awoken the neighbors who were yelling at them across their yard, and he had just about had enough. 

Without thinking, he American football punted the poor, lost thing out of the door and into the back yard. 

He immediately felt guilty for it.  It had just been lost and scared and confused, but he watched as it picked itself up and scrambled off into the darkness, likely to find another home to invade and another family to terrorize. 

It was fine.  He felt less bad.  It shouldn’t enter other people’s houses what did it think was going to happen? 

They stood there a moment, trying to take in the entire ordeal.  Jack looked at him before moving forward to shut the open door. He leaned against Mark and sighed, his eyebrows knitting together, “How the fuck did it get in?” 

“We must have left a window open or something.” 

“You realize we have to clean everything up, right?  Opossums are wild animals.  Who fucking knows where that thing has been.” 

Mark put a hand to his face and sighed. “I’ll get the bleach and the gloves.” 

Jack patted his butt as he walked back into the kitchen to get his own gloves and a broom, “That’s the spirit!” 

A few hours later, the sun had finally come up and their house had been put back into order.  The house practically sparkled as Mark threw his gloves off in the kitchen, washed his hands, went to his bedroom, stripped off everything except for his underwear, and curled under the covers.

He almost passed out then and there, but felt the absence of a strange green haired leprechaun that usually took up residence on top of his chest during the night. It drove him crazy. Why couldn’t he sleep well without Jack? Just for one night?  

Jack popped his head around the corner as if he had been called, “Mark?” 

“Whatever it is, the answer is ‘no’” 

“I just wanted to know if we can cuddle.” 

“Do you still smell like bleach and shame?” 

“Probably.” 

“Then no.  You sleep on your side.” 

Jack copied Mark’s movements of getting ready for bed, but as he tucked himself in, he gave Mark the biggest, best, puppy eyes he could muster before saying, “but I’m cute.” 

Smiling a little, Mark lifted his arm for Jack to worm his way into his chest.  “Go to sleep you idiot.” 

Snuggled into the man he loved, Jack sighed and began to drift. 

Mark smiled happily at the warm cute lump in him arms and made a mental note to try to work on that entire _I-can’t-sleep-without-my-boyfriend-anymore_ thing. 

He was almost asleep when from his chest he heard a sleepy Irish accented voice say, “I can’t believe we lost a wild animal in our house for two hours.” 

“Go the fuck to sleep you idiot.” 


End file.
